A cup of coffee, a sandwich, and my love.

I heard these words the other day, and I thought it was sweet and perfect for this month of December when love and hope and comfort food is in the air.... Images of steaming cups of coffee and warm toasty sandwiches and, of course, some unconditional love gather around the fireplace (my imaginary fireplace cause I don't have one ;)...)...

Do you see these images as well?

It seems I do.

Hence, the reason why I chose to use these words as my title.
 In my search for the right words.......in this forever long-life search of finding the right words... they seemed to fit somehow.

I suppose because it seems appropriate for how I am feeling these early days of December. To tell you the truth, I am mostly feeling all sorts of swamped with work coming from all directions in my life (book, masters, teaching, family, friends, house, ) but ......but somehow despite all the stress...

comfort and love and lots of hope keep me smiling and feeling all sorts of mushy mushy as well.

Yesterday, I attended an open house at a pre-school in hopes of introducing Annabelle's Love to some new children.. and this I did and I gotta say I felt happy.... truly happy in this world. Sometimes, I forget this feeling of ... I wrote and published a book that I hope many little girls will read and love and ask for at night... I wrote a book for little girls that I hope will sit on their nightstands or on their bookshelves...that I hope to sign and dedicate just to them so that they will always have and keep it ...

Sometimes, when the stress and work seem too much, I forget this feeling. Yesterday, it all came back to me, and I am very glad it did.
You see, what I am trying to say in awful awful ways at the moment.. is that yesterday was a great reminder of why I wrote this book. This visit to this school gave me the umpteenth boost to keep going and going. Because the best part of this book is actually sharing it with the children... the most fun really....

So, thank you Jen W. for the invite... thank you to all who supported Annabelle's Love yesterday and thank you, my title, for deeming yourself appropriate for this blog.

The title, yesterday's experience, and my hope are the perfect words for how I am feeling today.

So, on that final note...
here's my cup of coffee, my sandwich, and my love to you all... May they all conjure up some December images for you that are comforting, warm, loving and hopeful as well.
xo
Jenny RH
2010

November Words

Somehow November is now coming to an end...

Somehow this has happened with only one entry ...wait ...! now two entries to represent this month in my life...

So many words have transpired in my mind, in my heart, out of my mouth and onto others... Most words I can't recall, but many words have managed to be imprinted in my memory.

I guess all I can say is November makes me feel like reflecting ....for obvious reasons, of course. The days are shorter ...the leaves have fallen, the air is biting and crisp and ......well, November seems like the beginning of a long, lonely winter.... Yet....

November in America is meant to do just the opposite... For one, it clearly makes many of us take a day to remember the Veterans....remember them ..appreciate them ...admire them for their sacrifices.

November also asks us to take a day to remember all those we are thankful for...all things we are blessed with...all days we keep living.....another Monday at work.... two functioning legs ... a reliable car... a nosey but loving mother... the turkey on the table and the family you can't truly live without...not really.

For me, I am no different. Yes, November feels lonely at first but it ends with a room filled with many... And, for this I am grateful. And, as for Annabelle... well, she is grateful as well ... So many have had positive words to say about her message. So many have welcomed her and me with open, open WIDE open arms.

All of this makes me see... makes me understand... makes my November words close with ....
I may feel lonely during some of these days.... but I am not alone... BIG difference...big big difference.

So.... thank you all who fill my November days with unconditional love, amazing support, some funny jokes, lots and lots of words, tight hugs, warm kisses, beating hearts, sweet sweet smiles, huge teeth-baring grins, sincere memories and more... You rock my November world....you do.

All my love then,
Jenny RH
Nov. 2010

Here is my room filled with many xxx

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

It is November now, and I honestly am not sure how this happened. These days all I can seem to do is look at each day as yesterday, today and tomorrow. Dates don't seem to apply at all to these days....

I am a perfect example it seems of someone who is taking everything day by day ...maybe even second by second... Is this a bad thing? I am not sure really. It just is.

This is the way it has to be for me for a while... My yoga friends might say.. well, at least you are PRESENT. And, I might have to say yes,,, at least this.

Nevertheless, in these yesterdays, and todays and tomorrows, lots of great things are happening and lots of painful scary things are happening as well because as we all know, life continues on no matter what...no matter if you wish for it to stop and wait for you.  It just won't.

A quick glance at the people around you or even at the facebook newsfeed can show you this ....some people are thrilled about this or that while others are mourning a loss of some sort (RIP John)....

I suppose all I wish to say here today in this blog is whatever your days may be...whether you attach a date or not to them or are struggling to keep up with them, always cherish each moment and appreciate them. Life is a gift not a given.

Keep on trekking but keep on living... Find your happiness and don't let it go.

As for me, I am trying to do just this.... Each day this book brings me small joys and  big challenges.
This book and my search for happiness is what I strive for these days.....

All my love then... stay happy, stay focused, stay driven and always cherish.
Jenny

random pic to look at ... even this way... just tilt your head and be present ;) xxxx

Two full-time jobs and a view from my chair.

From my chair today I watched as leaf after leaf, after colorful leaf fell to the ground... I heard cars whiz on by on the way to who knows where... It has been a beautiful Fall day.

Lucky me who gets to enjoy it.
From my chair.

Why? Well, now I have come to the realization that I have two full-time jobs, and both require my full attention at all times. Hence, the title "full-time"...
What this has come to mean suddenly is...

that this Fall I get to gather information about marketing this book instead of apples.
This Fall I get to go people picking on who can sell my book instead of pumpkin picking.
This Fall I get to carve into my work of grading and "amazoning" instead of said pumpkins.
This Fall I get to hike over to the library or book store in search of a book signing instead of through the woods in search of fresh air.
This Fall I get to enjoy warm apple ciders only from memory because every second counts next to this computer screen and not even one can be lost once I am immersed in this work.
This Fall the only mask I will wear is one of face-cleansing because stress has turned my face into a battlefield of sorts.
This Fall... I can go on, but I won't.

 I'm not truly complaining..not truly... okay, maybe just a little but that's only because I do miss the freedom that comes with having nothing to do but enjoy apples, and cider, and books, and naps, and pumpkin picking and my family....

So, instead of complaining then, I shall instead focus on how lucky I am that today I accomplished so much and will accomplish more... all as I watched leaf after colorful leaf fall slowly to the ground. At least this much I can do to enjoy me some Fall.

All my love,
Jenny
x

A Lovely Blessed Wednesday

It all started with 12 book signings or maybe it started before that but let me just say it started to dawn on me when I actually sat down, looked at these 12 books purchased by some supportive coworkers and signed... They asked me to sign this book ...my book and they wanted my name...my signature and well, I guess it all of  a sudden hit me....like some delayed bolt of lightning...

I can't put into words what it means to look at these multiple copies of my book ...I suppose looking at my single proof copy didn't make it feel real enough for me yet... whatever words I find for this feeling...Well, I don't believe they will perfectly describe all the emotions I felt at once.

Let me try two then: Immense Fulfillment.

Next, came an email....a long-awaited email...it didn't say much, but it said enough to add just another smile. Needed this one a whole bunch. x

When I arrived home, I was introduced to a video interview of myself while in Germany for the book fair. And, if the look on my face doesn't express it all, I don't know what else could. The ready-to-burst- from-pure- excitement- and- nerves look was evident... clearly evident.

But, you know what, it was perfect ...in my opinion, it was perfect because it was me...just me. Same me, Same Jenny..down to the core...all fumbled and messy and a bit scattered when nervous.

A little bit later...I hopped on to Amazon to see if the cover of my book was added yet, and it wasn't but I didn't care because the book had received its very first review!! Five star review nonetheless! Well, what can I say to this sweet Florence Green but thank you!! And, true to form, I did----- immediately! I commented on her comment because I was grateful she not only liked the book but shared the message...

In the midst of all of these smiles and smirks and internal screams.... I received an email from a former student from two years ago. (This year there seems to be many of these..must have been doing something right...) She said she missed me at her new school, she said "you prepared us for 7th grade so much.." and really that is all she needed to say because then I knew ... at least for one student, I did my job, and I did it well.

So, can you see now why in the middle of the week I find myself feeling all sorts of lucky and blessed? I've somehow managed to love what I do and somehow these two loves have managed to reward me so nicely...no..... so amazingly... yes, yes... amazingly is the better word here.

And, I won't sign off until I add this one last thought... Part of this experience has been made even better by all of you out there who send me comments, and "like" my posts, who text me some sweet stuff or pass on and share my ideas... I couldn't do any of this without all of you....Any of it. You know who you are...and I am forever grateful to you----each and every single one of you.


So..... now I can close and say (Dave W) I'm sorry if I sound all mushy and mushy...
It's because I am ...this is me...all grateful, happy, mushy and blessed.... so deal with it and keep me laughing cause I need the laughs... ;)

All sincere about all of this...,

Me,
Jenny
x
Here are the links to said video and review...:)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bum1ubVR7CI&feature=mfu_in_order&playnext=1&videos=SWDMXIiTl1A

http://www.amazon.com/Annabelles-Love-Jenny-Ramirez-Hart/product-reviews/160976515X/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

Reaching for Annabelle

So.... my book is finally out and all should be just pure bliss, right? All should be all smiles and smiles. All should be like eyes up to the sky ....all like this and more....

but somehow
some way
 it is not.
And all I seem to feel now is heart to the floor.

With all of this, I find myself now looking and reaching for Annabelle knowing I need her so much more now than ever before...  the message she sends I can't seem to locate or recall. and...it seems I can't find her or the reasons why she now exists on paper.

I guess this is how life is... you take the good, but you must take the bad as well. Always a give and a take. I suppose it would be too much to ask if I wished for some good and some good. Life just doesn't work this way. At least not for me.

So, all that's left is to not give up. Annabelle, she will come back to me. I know. Time will bring her back to me. Time is a wonderful friend who eventually fixes everything...

Germany by the way was lovely...bittersweet lovely. No books were sold, but it was an amazing experience...
Met some incredible people from all over the world... and I felt at home when I was surrounded by all the books...so many so many books.

And this book..my book... well,  now it brings me into the next realm of things...that of an unknown working to share it with many,,,,hmmm
would help then if I could reach Annabelle... be Annabelle.

So, on this note... I shall be off ...I leave you with a pic from Germany.. the River Rhine... where all seemed possible then. When all seemed like I could get good and good all at once. Silly me. Silly me for thinking this.

All my love,
Jenny
Cheers x

Oh and here is the link for my long-awaited press release...
http://www.prlog.org/10991725-annabelles-love-your-first-love-should-always-be-yourself.html

and an extra link on my author page...
http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/AnnabellesLove.html

Ich wunshce Ihnen eine angenehme Reise.

Guten tag!
Ich heibe Jenny.
Ich bin American.
Ich komme aus New Jersey.
Wo ist der taxistand?
Wo ist die toilette?

These are the very few phrases I have learned so far... I clearly have a lot more to learn. I can't possibly  maintain any conversation with a native German with phrases consisting of Hello! My name is, I'm American, I'm from New Jersey, Where is the taxi stand? Where is the bathroom?

Clearly, I have a long way to go and very little time to do it. Learning how to get by on some more German was my intention... knowing that now I need to get by on a pathetic amount of German and lots of physical movements in the hopes that most people speak English (silly spoiled American) is my reality.

I'm off in two days time to my very first book fair in Frankfurt, Germany to show this book off ;), to share this book with many, to begin a lot of talk about this book and to hopefully have some German publishing company wish to publish my book in German.  All of this planned just in time to get the "travel warning"... so sad... so depressing...so scary really.

Like I haven't been all sorts of messy and stressed out about this trip already and what it means for me... the beginning of something, I hope! Let's throw in some fear of ....you know...can't bring myself to say it.

Nevertheless, aside from this fear and these nerves, I feel quite fantastic. As if I could separate all of these different feelings into little compartments, I've managed to feel quite pleased... Today, I received one expected package and one unexpected email.

The expected contained my PROOF copy of the book (yay!)... that I will need to examine very very closely so I can approve it... This means (after my approval) all will be set in motion more so than it has been already.

The unexpected came from the very reason I became a teacher... the very reason I wrote a book for children. It was an email and it was adorable and funny and honest but most of all it contained an "I miss English class from last year." and, well, you know... which person on earth wouldn't want to be missed by the very reason he or she works so hard for???

Sooooo..... so what...my German is pathetic? Who needs to master this language a bit more in order to get by these next few days??? Well, me ....but honestly, today (right now) I can't seem to sit still with all the bubbly happiness stirring up inside of me... I guess, this German will have to do...just have to do!

And, in the end, when all is said and done, I wish myself this and this here only, and I hope you do too...

Ich wunshce Ihnen eine angenehme Reise.

Because it means " I hope you have a pleasant journey."  ... I wish this for myself so very much...

All my love,
Jenny
x

I will try to post while in Germany, but most likely it will not happen until I return! I may even add some pictures of the entire experience as well.